Zen StonesWhat is self-care mean to you? Does it mean spa days, long naps, mid afternoon breaks, sleeping in on Saturday?

Well self-care are all of those things and so much more.

The Merriam-Webster definition of self-care is simple: Self-care is the care for oneself

The actuality of that statement is deeper than most of us even recognize.  What is the care for oneself? What does that care look like?

I’m going to share five ways that you can begin taking care of yourself on a daily basis, how you schedule you into your day and how you can begin to truly begin to define self-care on your own terms.

So, let’s get to it!

  1. Knowing how you want to feel – Knowing how you want to feel is the foundation in all self-care rituals. Until you are clear about how you want to feel, you will spend a majority of your day moving through O.P.P (Other People’s Priorities) Who you are and what you want, need, desire will be lost in pleasing and working for others. Get clear on how you want to feel by creating your foundational feelings, posting them in your car, in your planner, on your wall, in your phone. Planning your day around how you want to feel at the end of each day, causes you to create days that are filled with purpose versus days that feel like you are running around in a hamster wheel.
  2. Applying the boundaries that you’ve set – This is the second foundation of your self-care base. Setting boundaries and applying boundaries are two completely different things. Setting a boundary is when you draw that line in the sand communicating clearly what you either need for a person to do or not do any further. Applying the boundary is when you are consistently applying the consequences for the boundary you set. Applying a boundary is just as important as setting the boundary, they each need one another be be effective. When applying a boundary be sure to be clear on your ‘why’ behind setting it, it makes enforcing it much easier. When you set your boundary it should be clear as to what you need the other person to do or not do. Don’t worry about over explaining, better to over explain, than to leave out pieces you think the other person ‘gets’ and have a broken boundary. Next be consistent in applying, if they don’t follow through, be prepared to apply the consequence in love.
  3. Managing your energy –  There are a bunch of sources telling you to manage your time, manage your time. The fact is time can’t be managed, see you can’t control time no more than you can control when the sun is going to rise or set. So, I teach moms how to manage their energy to make the best use of their time. This is through goal setting, action plans, schedules and task lists. And, what’s the best way to plan? By basing your goals and schedules off of how you want to feel in different areas of your life, which will tie into your why. When you are managing how you use your energy, you will find yourself more fulfilled and happy instead of stressed and depressed. You need to become a master of your schedules. Your schedules and task lists need to be based off of your goals that you have set for your life. Everything needs to be clear and written down.
  4. Time for you – You need to set aside time for you everyday. Not once a month or whenever you become super stressed and exhausted from everyday life. Each morning you should start your day with a morning ritual that includes; prayer, meditation, some form of movement for at least 10 minutes and journaling or getting clear on your day ahead. You should be taking breaks throughout the day to reset your mind and body so that you can work smarter and with more focus. Each week you should be doing something special for you be that a mani/pedi day, a massage, long hot bath whatever you know will give you that charge to push forward. You also need a hobby something fun that you get fully immersed in because you love it so much, it could be; scrapbooking, painting, running, bowling or going to the movies. Adding you to schedule is the fourth foundation of your self-care base, this is important because even with the other three foundations, adding rest and fun to your plans gives you something to look forward too and allows you to stay on task and consistent with all of the hard work you’ve done above.
  5. Creating a plan – This is the final step in your self-care foundation. You must have a road map for how all of this is going to work for you. If you are struggling in creating and following a plan for your life may I suggest the 30 Day Push Program and the Push Goals 90 Day Planner from Chalene Johnson, not only is it awesome but it’s FREE. The program will guide you through 30 days on how to create goals for your life and how to plan your day, the planner is just that a planner to use so that you are staying focused and on task with your goals taking actionable steps for them each day. I also recommend Brendon Burchard’s program, Your Next Bold Life, this takes you through four weeks of getting clear and focused on the goals for your life, this program is $49.

Remember, all five of these steps need one another to work. If you do one but not the others your life will still be out of harmony and you will continue to l feel like you are running but going no where. Don’t expect your execution to be perfect, or for you to have this cute little balance. Some steps will be executed better than others at various times of your life. Just do your best each day to make sure that you are taking care of you.

Over To You:

Which one of these steps do you need to add to your life now? Where do you think you need the most support? Share your breakthroughs, questions and solutions on my Facebook page. Fly on over to my Facebook page, this week’s blog posting will be pinned to the top of the page. Share your ah-ha’s and questions there, I’m there everyday so I always answer back!

Until Next Time
Peace Love & Recovery
Charmaine

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